Que Bella!

In Chicago at our Purple Palace Reunion, I spent a lot of time with our little honorary Purple Palace Lady, Bella. Bella is Monica’s little two-year old girl. She is about the sweetest, most considerate, most loving, most adorable little girl I’ve ever met. She constantly impressed me and charmed me…and I was constantly impressed with Monica, as well. Bella didn’t just happen to turn out the way she is, I firmly believe that it has everything to do with Monica and her husband Eric. Bella and I got along really well, and for the first time I really felt in my heart, “Hey. I can do this. I can be a mom.” Of course it was just a long weekend…definitely not the same as the real 24/7 deal, but still, I felt really good about it. That’s not to say I didn’t have a couple of little reality checks reminding that maybe I’m not quite ready to be a mom just yet…example: one night out at a restaurant I was feeling really good about helping Bella cut her macaroni-and-cheese into little bites and warning her that it was hot…and then I emphatically blew on one bite to demonstrate the hotness and help her cool it off…and I blew so hard that cheese flew into my eye. Ooops. Then there were a couple of dicey moments where I almost spiraled into an existential crisis. You see, Bella is at the age where she likes to ask ‘Why?’ all of the time. I applaud her curiosity and I tried to speak to her in an adult way (none of that baby-talk crap)…however sometimes I took things a bit too far. Example:

Tina: Bella I think we should walk down the stairs instead of me carrying you.

Bella: Why?

Tina: Well, you’re kinda big and I don’t want to drop you.

Bella: Why?

Tina: Well, I’m not strong enough to carry you.

Bella: Why?

Tina: Well, I don’t work out enough and don’t have a lot of upper-body strength. Besides, I’m worried I could drop you. I’m very safety conscious.

Bella: Why?

Tina: I think it has to do with birth order; I’m an oldest child. Or maybe I’m just kind of neurotic?!?!

…….….Or for another example:

Tina: Bella, don’t push on my stomach, please.

Bella: Why?

Tina: Because it doesn’t feel very good when you do that.

Bella: Why?

Tina: Well, I have digestive problems.

Bella: Why?

Tina: Well, I think it might be stress related.

Bella: Why?


….And so on and so forth.

It was a really fun weekend and even though I’d already spent some time with Bella when she was younger, it was really great to get to see her again and see how much she’d grown. It was also great to feel like maybe I really could be a good mom someday…and also to see that it’s a ton of work and that day is definitely a few years away.